SEO Doesn't Work If You Don't F**king Let It!

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You've hired an SEO expert, you've paid them good money, and

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then you spend all your time either breathing down their neck like a

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paranoid boss or telling them to stay in their lane.

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Either way, you're sabotaging your own results. Let's do

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this.

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This is SEO fucking one. I'm Nicky. I've been in SEO

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for over 30 years before it was even called SEO.

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I help people like you make money from your website

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by actually getting found in search. And today, we're

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tackling something that's been coming up more and more. The two

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ways businesses completely fuck up working with SEO

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freelancers and consultants.

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You either micromanagers, like we're your newest graduate hire

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who can't be trusted to make a cup of tea, or you go the opposite

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direction and refuse to let us anywhere near the information we

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need to do the job properly. Both approaches are costing you

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money. And honestly, both are driving good SEO people

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away from working with you. Let me tell you about

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a client I parted ways with recently.

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Every time I asked for conversion data, you know, the stuff that

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tells me whether the traffic I'm bringing in is actually doing anything good,

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I got told to stay in my lane. Every time I suggested moving

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a call to action button because it was buried at the bottom of the page

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like a shameful secret, I got the same response.

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That's not SEO. Stick to what you know. We've got it under

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control. Thanks. We'll let you know if our internal experts need your help.

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I get it. You've got departments, you've got territories.

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Everyone's got their little kingdom that they're protecting. But this

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is what people don't seem to understand. SEO doesn't

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exist in a vacuum. It never has. And it

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really, really definitely doesn't these days.

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Hiring an SEO expert but not letting them look at the bigger picture

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is like hiring a plumber to fix your leaky tap. But telling

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them they're not allowed to check your water pressure. They might get the tap working,

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but you're still going to have problems. And we all know who you're going to

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blame when your ceiling falls down. So let's talk about the

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two main ways that businesses fuck this up.

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First of all, the micromanagement problem.

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Treating freelancers like employees, and not even good

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employees, more like employees you don't trust to wipe their own

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asses. I've had clients who wanted daily check

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ins daily for SEO work. What am I going to

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tell you every single day? Yep, we're still waiting for

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Google to index that page. Same as yesterday and

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the day before. See you tomorrow for the exact same

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update. And then there's the obsession with making freelancers use

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your internal systems. And look, I've been doing this for three decades.

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I've got processes that work across multiple clients. I've

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refined these systems over years of trial and error. But sure,

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let me abandon all of that to learn your bespoke project management

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tool that someone's nephew built in 2019 and hasn't

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been updated since. And don't get me started on the meetings.

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Oh, God, the meetings. Can you join our weekly team?

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Catch up? No, No, I cannot, because I

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have other clients and I'm not sitting through 45 minutes of Barry

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from accounts talking about the new coffee machine when I could be actually

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doing the work you're paying me for. Because what businesses don't seem to

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grasp is that when you hire a freelancer, you're not hiring

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a remote employee. You're engaging an independent

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business. Someone who brings expertise from working with

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multiple clients across different industries. Someone who's

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seen what works and what doesn't across dozens of different

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situations. You chose a freelancer

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specifically to avoid the management hassle. You

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wanted results without the overheads of employment. So why are you

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now trying to manage me like I'm fresh out of university and need

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handholding through every decision? You're paying for my expertise.

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Let me fucking use it. And then there's the

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stay in your lane problem. That's the opposite end of the spectrum.

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The clients who don't micromanage your process as such,

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but do restrict your access to everything you need to deliver results.

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When I ask for mobile versus desktop conversion data,

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it's not because I'm bored and fancy a bit of one on one spreadsheet action

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is because I can see your mobile traffic is bouncing and I suspect

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your conversion rates are shite too. That information directly

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affects my SEO recommendations. When I suggest changing

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your call to action button test from Submit Inquiry,

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which sounds like you're filing a complaint with the Council, to some things

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that might actually encourage people to click it, that's not

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me overstepping, that's me trying to make sure the traffic I bring you does

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something useful. And when I ask for heatmap data to see

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where people are giving up and leaving your pages, I'm not trying to steal

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your UX team's job. I'm trying to understand user

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behavior so I can optimize for it. Google's been clear about this

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for years. User experience signals matter. If people

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land on your site from A search result immediately think sod this

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and go back to Google. That tells Google your page wasn't a good answer

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to their query. Your rankings will suffer. So when you tell me to

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stay in my lane and tell me to only worry about keywords and

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rankings, you're asking me to do half a job.

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And then you wonder why you're not getting the results you expected.

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And there's a real cost of getting this wrong, because let's say your

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SEO work successfully doubles your organic traffic

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over six months. Brilliant. Except if your conversion rate

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is rubbish, because nobody's looking at the user experience.

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You've just doubled the number of people who visit your site and fuck right

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off without buying anything or booking a call. Or maybe your

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conversion rate is fantastic, but your mobile experience is so poor

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that Google starts ranking you lower. And all that beautifully

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converting traffic disappears. And nobody can figure out why,

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because this is what happens when teams work in isolation

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or when freelancers aren't given access to the full picture.

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You optimize for one metric while accidentally sabotaging

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another. You fix one problem, but you create three

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more. And I've watched businesses spend thousands on

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SEO to drive more traffic, then watch their inquiry numbers

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stay flat because nobody thought to check if their contact forms worked on

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a mobile. I've seen companies with brilliant

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products lose rankings because their developers

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optimized the site in ways that confuse search engines.

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And nobody thought to involve the SEO person in that decision.

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It's maddening and it's completely avoidable.

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Okay, so here's the fix you've been waiting for.

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So here's the fix you've been waiting for. How do you actually

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work with an SEO expert, freelancer or otherwise, in

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a way that gets you results. So first of all,

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brief, properly up front. Spend time on

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detailed project briefs or onboarding calls. Explain your

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objectives, your expectations, your deadlines, and how you'll measure

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success. Share relevant background about your business, your customers,

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your competitors. Freelancers can't read your mind about your company

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history or your own state of preferences. Secondly,

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establish clear communication from the start. Agree on the

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methods and frequency upfront. Some freelancers prefer

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email, others use project tools. Some provide weekly

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updates, some monthly. Others provide milestone check ins.

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Figure out what works for both of you before the project

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starts, not halfway through, when everybody's already pissed off.

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Set response time expectations both ways. If you need

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24 hour responses, discuss that during the talks.

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And remember, it goes both ways. If you take two weeks to

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approve something, don't expect the freelancer to magically absorb that

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Delay. And for the love of all that is holy,

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clarify what urgent actually means. If everything's

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urgent, nothing is. Define what constitutes a real

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emergency versus a standard turnaround time.

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Thirdly, give your freelancer access to what they need. Your

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SEO expert needs to see conversion data, user

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behavior, insights, analytics. They need to understand what's

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happening after people land on your site. If you're hiding this

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information because it belongs to a different department, you're capping their

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ability to deliver results. Let them talk to your developers when

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technical changes are needed. Let them see your sales data so they

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understand what makes customers buy. Stop treating information

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like it's classified government secrets. You're not that important.

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And fourthly, respect their expertise. You hired

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your SEO because they know things you don't. So when they make

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recommendations, don't demand that they justify every single one

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with a detailed explanation of basic SEO principles

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backed up by exact percentages or data of how much

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traffic you'll get. If you want to understand their approach, ask

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questions, but let them apply their professional judgment. And

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if you disagree with a recommendation, have a conversation about it.

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Don't just override them and then blame them when results don't

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materialize. And fifthly, trust their

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processors. Most good freelancers have systems refined

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across multiple clients. These ensure consistent

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quality and timely delivery. If you need specific tools or

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methods, discuss that during hiring, not mid project, when

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they've already set everything up. Don't micromanage their schedule or

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ask for timesheets as long as deadlines are met. How they structure their

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work time shouldn't be your concern. They might do their best work at

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6 o' clock in the morning or still be squirreling away at midnight. It

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doesn't matter as long as the work gets done. Freelancing isn't 9

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to 5. Sixth and last plan for

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success Book your freelancers in advance. Good

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ones are scheduled weeks ahead. Plan for potential delays

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on your end and factor those into project timelines.

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Provide all the necessary resources up front. Passwords,

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assets, access to systems, whatever they need to get started.

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Nothing wastes time more than a freelancer sitting around

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waiting for you to send them the login details you promised three days

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ago. The choice here is pretty simple. You can respect your

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SEO expert as an independent professional and get excellent results.

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Or you can try to manage them like a junior employee while

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simultaneously refusing to give them the information they need and

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frustrate everyone involved. And good freelancers won't tolerate

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either extreme for long. They'll find clients who understand

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the value of expertise and independence, and you'll be back on

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the market looking for another SEO person wondering why you keep

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having the same problems. Your SEO expert isn't trying

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to take over your business when they ask for conversion data or suggest

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UX improvements. They're trying to make sure the traffic they bring

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you actually makes you money. That's the whole point.

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If this episode resonated with you, or if you want to share it with

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a client who needs to hear it, make sure you're following SEO.

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Fucking what? In whatever app you're using so you don't miss the next

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episode. And if you've got a horror story about micromanagement

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or being told to stay in your lane, drop me a message on

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LinkedIn or by email. I'd love to hear it. I might even

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put the best ones together for a future episode. Until next

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time. Get found, make money. Been on

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wanky.